Sex: Disney Villains I’d Sleep With aka Ursula is Hot

Watching The Little Mermaid with my nieces and nephews this weekend, I came to a not-so-shocking realization: I’d totally do Ursula.

Big red lips, big round boobs, big giant booty. Yum. (Have you seen the abomination which is the new skinny Ursula. So not ok.)

This, of course, got me thinking about all the other sexy Disney villains, so, in true Queerie Bradshaw fashion, I decided to make a list of the ones I’d sleep with. Considering multiple theorists believe villains in general, and especially Disney villains, are historically queer anyways, I figure I’ve got a chance with a few of them.

 

#1: Ursula from The Little Mermaid. She inspired the list, so she gets top spot.

 

#2: Maleficent from Sleeping Beauty. It’s her hat. I love a good hat. Plus, Angelina Jolie is going to play her in an upcoming movie and dayum, she looks hot.

 

#3: Evil Queen from Snow White (does she have a name?): She is the fairest of them all. Fuck Snow White.

 

#4: Queen of Hearts from Alice in Wonderland: Again, love the outfits!

 

#5: Cruella de Vil from 101 Dalmations: Despite that whole cruelty to animals thing, you’ve gotta dig her style.

 

#6: Madame Medusa from The Rescuers: I love redheads.

 

#7: Madam Mim from Sword in the Stone: She’s far from stereotypically attractive, but I’ve got a thing for witches. Plus, Morganna has always been a great character, totally beats Merlin, especially in the BBC series.

 

#8: The Claw from Toy Story: This was listed on the Disney Villain website. I figured lots of the sex I have is with manmade machines, so hey, might as well add the claw to this list.

 

 

So, what do you think of my list? Who’s on your villain to-do list?

About Queerie Bradshaw

Lauren Marie Fleming loves to put both sides of her brain to use. A writer since childhood, she runs the critically-acclaimed QueerieBradshaw.com blog and writes for major news sources as an expert on the legal and social issues surrounding sex, sexuality, gender and gender identity. Lauren also started Frisky Feminist Press (FriskyFeminist.com), which features sexual education guides and classes from the top sex educators on the Internet. From ivy-league universities to major conferences, Lauren has spoken all over the country and is internationally recognized for her dynamic, educational workshops. Check out her workshop page for a complete list of workshops and upcoming speaking engagements. A law school graduate, she started Creativity Squared, LLC to help bloggers, writers and other creative types turn their ideas into practical, sustainable products or services. Lauren particularly loves helping people find and amplify their voice, dig deep to write their difficult truths, and make a profit by doing what they love. Lauren offers her consulting services through group classes and individual coaching. Lauren is currently shopping her memoir, Losing It: My Life as a Sex Blogger, based on her popular Curve magazine sex blog. She is also working on a diverse young adult series. Lauren is represented by Jane Dystel of DGLM.
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5 Responses to Sex: Disney Villains I’d Sleep With aka Ursula is Hot

  1. I completely agree with your top 3.

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