Sex: 7 Semi-Celebrities I Want to Sleep With While I’m Single

Now that I’m single again, I’m going to make the most of it and try to sleep my way through my semi-celebrity hot list. (To be fair, since I was in an open relationship I could have done it before, but it’s more fun when you’re single.)

While I’d obviously love some Maddow action or a threesome with Portia and Ellen, semi-celebrities are a lot more plausible and honestly a lot more exciting.

Here are 7 people I’d be happy to spend the afternoon with and extremely happy to spend the night with.

 

  1. Jiz Lee – Yes, Jiz Lee is mega-hot, but beyond that, I’ve got the biggest intellectual boner for Jiz (who goes by gender-neutral pronouns of they/them). Their Karma Pervs project – which donates online pornography sales to local nonprofits – is inspiring, their blog posts are educationally enticing and they were so adorable during the taping of Life Sex Show I can’t help but think Jiz would be a great person to chat with about the politics of fisting while playing Ms. Pac Man.
  2. Hannah Hart – I’d get drunk in her kitchen. Food, booze and hot lesbians. Can it get better than this? We’d laugh, we’d cry, we’d cook, then we’d make out. I must make this happen.
  3. Adepero Oduye – I don’t know if she’s actually gay, but here’s hoping. I haven’t actually had a chance to see Pariah, the film in which she plays a queer teen questioning her identity, but the stills make my heart and loins both swoon in one big happy ball of sexual desire.
  4. Melissa Ferrick – Ok, this one might be too famous for me, but hey, she’s hot and going on my list. I love that she’s a sober musician. We’d go get tea then make out.
  5. Allison Weiss – To be honest, I had no idea who Allison Weis was until the Autostraddle.com interview with her. Now I want to have her babies and then have all of her albums. Maybe albums first then babies. Either way, sex would be involved.
  6. Mars Hobrecker – Another one I found via Autostraddle (they know all the sexy people), Mars is super queer and a super talented photographer.
  7. The Shondes – Yes, I realize this is a whole band, but I couldn’t pick just one so I’m going with a group thing here. Hey, I like to dream big.

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Who would be on your semi-celebrity to-do list?

 

About Queerie Bradshaw

Lauren Marie Fleming is a writer, speaker and motivator known for her intimate, informative and often hilarious look at sex, relationships and body-image. Lauren runs the critically-acclaimed QueerieBradshaw.com blog, writes for major news sources including VICE, Nerve, Huffington Post and Curve, and is the author of her memoir Losing It: My Life as a Sex Blogger. In 2013, Lauren founded Frisky Feminist Press (FriskyFeminist.com) as a way to enhance conversations about sexuality through educational guides, online classes and entertaining publications. A law school graduate, Lauren has spoken all over the United States and is internationally recognized for her dynamic, engaging style. In everything she does, Lauren’s goal is to educate, remove stigmas and encourage people to achieve their desires.
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