Taxes are a pain in the ass, but like it or not, they’re due today for Americans. If you’re one of the lucky people who got tax refunds (I owe this year – being self-employed is not always sunshine and porn), here are some suggestions for what to do with that extra cash.
1. Save it.
Seriously. To me, one of the sexiest things anyone can do is plan for the future and be fiscally responsible. Here are things I try to have money set aside for (key word try, as a writer, it’s very difficult to have a money buffer):
- Trips.
- Retirement (it’s never too early to save for that).
- A homestead with loads of goats and chickens.
- A rainy day.
I also try to pay off my debt when possible. Check out Suze Orman’s tools for some tough love advice and help on financial planning. She has a great way of figuring out if you can actually afford to buy something.
2. Have a Staycation
If you’re going to spend that money, spend it on something amazing, like staying in and taking care of yourself. Here are some ideas:
- Book a hotel room. Raid the mini-bar and watch cheesy in-room movies.
- Get yourself some of GoodVibe’s body-safe, sex-initiating body rubs, bath bombs and massage bars. Whether used alone or with a special friend, they’re a great way to take your relaxation to a new level.
- Grab yourself a massage or acupuncture treatment.
- Visit a local place you’ve never seen. Travel your city like a tourist.
3. Buy Some Quality Porn
Most free stuff on the Internet is crap and steals its content (with the exception of WoodRocket), so you should avoid it. Instead, this tax season treat yourself to some quality porn. Here are some of my favorites:
- Pretty much anything streaming at Pink Label VOD, where they feature ethical, feminist porn ranging from queer to straight to everything in between. Check out their list of Feminist Porn Award winners on demand.
- If you’re looking for queer porn, check out Courtney Trouble’s endeavors on IndiePornRevolution.com and QueerPorn.TV.
- For those more heterosexually inclined, I like the jessica drake’s Guides to Wicked Sex series, Lost & Found (like a romantic comedy with full sex), or the original classic Debbie Does Dallas.
4. Get a New Book
I’m a sapiosexual, so I think reading is sexy and often spend extra cash on new books. If you’re looking for some ideas for must-read queer literature (or Qliterature as I call it), check out this post on the subject.
I’m also a big fan of audiobooks and recently really loved Elizabeth Gilbert’s Signature of All Things, which isn’t necessarily about sex but has some brilliant commentary on it. It’s long but worth it.

From NYTimes Book Review. Main character from Signature of All Things.
Also, the Harry Potter series on audiobook is the best thing that’s ever happened to my ears.
5. Grab Some Outdoor Gear
Ok, so my inner dyke is shining through with this one, but seriously, the weather is getting to be perfect for spending all day every day outside.
- Buy a National Parks Pass. Two people can sign it so you can share it with a friend or your partner! The pass is good for one car and you can put as many people in that car as you want, so fill your Subaru to the brim and go explore.
- Pretty much anything at REI is a justifiable purchase in my opinion. Choose a new sport to try this summer!
- Buy a bike. I highly suggest adding some streamers to its handlebars. They make me feel like I’m going so fast.
- Check out these outdoor adventure ideas on Pinterest. Also, I highly suggest the book Glamping by Mary Jane for those who, like me, like to femme it up while roughing it.
6. Upgrade Your Sex Toy Collection
Give your bedside table a bit of an upgrade with some of my favorite toys:
- We-Vibe Tango, small but shockingly powerful vibrator.
- Get a new harness! Use my Choosing a Harness for Strap-On Sex guide to help you choose which one is best for you.
- The Fling by NobEssence is still one of my favorite toys ever, hitting my spot just perfectly.
- Pretty much anything Tantus makes I love (SheVibe.com is offering 15% off all Tantus products until April 30, as if they read my mind). Check out their harnesses!
- Join infamous sex toy reviewer Epiphora and I Friday as we chat about our favorite toys and help you pick one in our LIVE Q&A, or see it on my YouTube channel afterwards if you can’t make it.
7. Donate to Your Favorite Charity
Start your tax breaks for next year now while supporting important causes. If you need ideas of great places, here are some I love and support:
- Scarleteen.com, providing accessible sex education for teens.
- National Center for Lesbian Rights, helping people of all sexual orientations and gender identities and fighting the fights a lot of other major organizations shy away from.
- Salon97: Classical music for the other 97%, brings classical music to the masses through free programming, which is only free because of donations by members.
- City of Hope, providing hope for cancer patients, including my father and brother.
Also check out the massive giveaway JoEllen Notte (The Redhead Bedhead) is doing on her site as a fundraiser for her friend with cancer.
Well those are all of my ideas. How are you planning on spending your refund?